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September 4, 2011

 

Swimming in a pool of melted caramel sounds sweet, but sure is sticky!

 

   

That is the way this Kindle idea is. Oh yah, so easy, just put your book together and push a few buttons. HA!

 

I had to stop and write of my experiences because there's been too many. First, I have my paper bag in hand hyperventilating over this Table of Contents page I have literally spent all day trying to figure out. Finally found a video on You Tube how to get the thing to semi-work! You tube! of all places! Found some videos of how to upload the book to Kindles, too. At this rate I'll never get the book going. I did get my ISBN numbers. Had to buy a batch of ten. That was $250. Ouch!!!

 

Anyways, I need to go knock down my rose crop on Farmville- can see the hubby rolling his eyes over that. Yah, I'm quite addicted to the game. Not a good thing for the summer. It's okay during the winter when the last thing you want to do is mow the lawn, ride the horses, brush hog the fields, paint a trailer roof, remodel a future rental, change the oil in the car, or go visit the dentist...  wait so that is why I like to hide in my office and play Farmville- escape! LOL

 

Anyhow- our friend had a baby boy almost two weeks ago and it can not digest dairy products and has had projectile vomiting- trust me twelve feet is impressive coming from a tiny being only weighing eight pounds. They played hob with the doctors until a specialist finally got the baby on the right track. That side-tracked me some from my Kindles project.

 

Got the front porch pressure washed and couldn't resist hitting the front of the garage too. Of course this lead to the discovery that water is pooling alongside the garage and I now need to dig a third French drain. What's one more. As you know I've been digging a trench between the garage and the swimming pool. Yah, I found the waterline but I missed it with the pick- SWEW!

The second French drain is right in front of the house. The cement pad is dipping back toward the house! That's why the previous owners had run a bead of caulk between the house and the cement pad of the front porch. Here I thought it was just a nifty idea to keep the spiders out! Yah- chalk that one up for Dummies Buying A House Guide. Of course, that doesn't top the gutter never being run across the back porch, explaining why the water shoots off the aluminum porch roof. The fact that the roof is angled too much toward the house also explains all the ice from this past winter. The fact that no one put the metal flashing across the board would explain the carpenter bees- but why would you need that if you skipped the gutter??? The fact that there is no fascia I think is the term for the metal that goes under the overhang of the roof to keep the attic from being exposed would explain where the Starlings and bats are hanging out. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. So much for just climbing a ladder to fix a minor clog in the downspout!!!!!  Hey, to bad they already wrote a book called The Money Pit because this farm sure is coming in close seconds! Oh, God, I just realized the guy was a writer, too.

 

 You can quit laughing Aunt Barb, I can hear you from here. And don't say, "Sorry, Honey, I know it's not funny." I know you know because I know how many times you and Uncle have fixed stuff like this.

 

Anyways-today we cut the telephone pole out of the roof of the trailer. That has been a two year battle between getting the wire rerouted and the new wire dug into the ground. The pole, yes, was literally through the roof of the building and no it was not sealed. Birds were making their nests in the roof. No, I don't know who built the roof around the pole I just hope I am not related, except by Noah in the family tree line.

 

Took my first school trip out the other day and things went well. I tried to hit three fawns on the way in- all in a group- with my car.

On the way to the school a pair of road workers were crossing the road when I came around the bend. Good thing I am really cautious about this particular bend. The first guy was looking the wrong way. His foot hit the yellow line when he looked at me he did a complete about face- right smack into the face of the second guy- knocking the guys safety hat off. Thank goodness there was no traffic coming in the other lane. They stumbled off the roadside, the guy chasing his plastic cap. Of course I laughed, no one was hurt and that was funny- I don't care who you are. Where was the camera when you needed it. I know that was good for at least the ten thousand dollar prize on America's Funniest.

 

Well, it's time to go swim in some sticky sweet idea of becoming a published author through Kindles. If my kids didn't give me grey hairs this surely will. I better go take my paper bag to the bathroom and see if I find any... this could be my last entry... if you don't hear from me by next month come looking for me... I'll be grey and sticking around hear someplace- damn caramel.

 

 

PS  Trip went great until I got home. We had to bury Calipso, my white Tom cat.  His merriment will be sorrowfully missed.